“Every desire that demands satisfaction – and every need to be met – is at least potentially an occasion for people to initiate the negotiation process.” Gerard I.Nierenbergy
As an Executive, you are likely no stranger to negotiating in business or in your general daily life.
Like all children, you no doubt started off your life as a brilliant negotiator! Yet as time went on, like so many (particularly women) your amazing negotiation super powers perhaps started to become a little rusty. Which is why it’s so important to re-discover and apply these skills throughout your career.
We need to negotiate our salaries when and where we feel our needs are not being met on the work front. It is our responsibility to prepare for, initiate and execute a well- planned salary package negotiation discussion.
Some avoid negotiations completely, while others go in ill prepared and leave disappointed. Others initiate the discussion, prepare effectively and conduct the negotiation with finesse – achieving a win / win outcome.
One the key ingredients that successful negotiators possess is a good understanding of humour behaviour. They can look beyond simply satisfying their own needs, through factoring in and making assumptions about the needs (direct & indirect) of the other party with whom they are negotiating. Considering the assumptions and needs of the other party increases your chances of a positive outcome. Particularly, understanding that when you are negotiating your salary with the decision maker, you are factoring in that they are representing two parties and two different sets of needs – their own personal needs and that of the organisation.
For more information on Salary Negotiation see my post ‘The 7 Steps to Successful Salary Negotiation’
To learn more about how to prepare effectively for your next Salary Package Negotiation, you can purchase a copy of my book on Amazon – ‘The Busy Women’s Guide to… Salary Negotiation’ . In addition I offer one to one virtual salary negotiation coaching support.
Our careers are not ours alone. They are the product of and the input of many. From our teachers – both formal and informal, family who support us and friends, industry associations, mentors, advocates, colleagues and so on. To have the mindset that our careers are ours alone – a puzzle to be figured out only by ourselves may seem the case in our minds, however, it is not the reality.
If you look at any ‘successful’ people they will attribute many to their success. Think of Arnold Schwarzenegger who dislikes the label of being a self -made man. He highlights he got where he is today with the help and support of many.
Which is why, I often don’t understand why so many are reluctant to network to help grow their expertise and networks and information sources. To engage a coach – be it life coach, career coach, executive coach, image consultant, counsellor, voice coach and so on. Or to seek out mentors, sponsors or advocates. To have a team of people to support and encourage them through this maze of our working lives. People to help them be the best they can.
If you reflect on your career to date, do you;
· See it as a lone road you have travelled and will continue to travel?
· Seek out the support of others?
· Give support to others in their careers?
Is it time to start building your team of advocates, information sources, coaches and so on to have the worklife and success you desire, whatever it may look like.
If you are at the stage where you are looking to re-assess your life and or career, this is a wonderful post on LinkedIn, The 5 Biggest Regrets People Have Before They Die
While the title sounds somewhat morbid, it is actually a poignant article based on the experience of someone caring for terminally ill people. They recount the regrets that people have about various aspects of their lives – be it relationships, love, leisure, work……
Interestingly, it also looks at all those things that hold people back from doing what they really wanted to be doing with their lives– which is often sadly the expectations and opinions of others!
The article serves to force us to reflect on what is truly important to us, and how we want to live our lives.
How do you truly want to live 2017 and beyond? Is it time to chart your own course?
Interview on Marie TV – “Marie Forleo talks to the legendary Seth Godin about handling failure in life, overcoming writer’s block, self-doubt and starting something that matters right here and now.”
If you need some inspiration for creating and living a life you want in 2017, this interview with Marie Forleo and Seth Godin should provide exactly what you need. While the messaging has a slant towards setting up your own venture, it is equally relevant to those who are employees, or maybe looking to set up a side business.
There is one major area I disagree with in the interview, where Seth talks about finding your passion and the dream job or business. He says that it does not exist. The fundamental problem here is that like so many, Seth Godin falls into the trap of getting fixated on a job title or business type, a label if you will. Rather than the person, their values and transferable skills. Our careers are fluid not fixed. We get too caught up on the labels of what we should be doing and what is a great job or career that makes sense or is socially acceptable. We forget that it is not about the label, it is about knowing who we are and what matters most to us. This I think is passion.
In the interview, Seth Godin cites people such as Steve Jobs and that if he was born in a different time in history the iPhone and iPod etc. would not have been created. Steve Jobs would not have had the label or job title he did. He misses the point, for I believe that whatever period Steve Jobs was born in, he would no doubt still have been a visionary and an innovator – regardless of the widget he created. His skills, attributes and values would have fed into something else. Seth Godin continues to cite a few other famous people such as Vincent van Gogh, making the same points around labels. Again, I put forward the same argument. All the examples he references have a theme in that they are people who had a decent level of self-awareness and who would have made a wonderful contribution to the world, however it was packaged or labelled.
The message from the interview is to back yourself and that the best time to act and live the life you want is NOW. Which I 100% agree with. There are a wold of possibilities for us all.
For me, it all comes back to our level of self- awareness, combined with the confidence to act. The more we know about ourselves, our values and behaviours, our core skills and personal attributes, the more chance we have to channel these into a myriad of career paths that we will find rewarding – even be passionate about! Rather than looking for the one elusive dream job, we need to reflect on who we are, what we love doing and what the world needs!
As an accredited Type trainer (Step I & II) I facilitate interactive and engaging workshops on the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator® (MBTI®) or using the more modern version of the tool, The Majors.
Type is a highly regarded tool that is used to gain insights into personal preferences and increase self awarness (EQ). It explores individual preferences around the four functions:
The Type tools go deeper than perhaps some have experienced in prior training where a simple explanation of Type was given, before being presented with a four letter Type report i.e ESTJ. When rich training and discussion (both group and one on one) is provided Type helps individuals and teams explore their personal preferences around the four functions. It also looks at different Interaction Styles, the Four Temperament Groups, leadership styles, causes for stress and how to reduce this and much more. Step II training of Type is valuable for those who have done basic Type training before and have a reasonable level of self awareness, however, are looking to develop this to the next level.
Based on the original work of Swiss Psychiatrist Carl Jung, Type It has stood the test of time and is utilised across the world for a variety of purposes including career development, team building, leadership development and stress management.
To learn more about Type training for teams and or individuals, contact me or visit my Type page.
Today I took the time to slowly and indulgently read through an article that has been lying around the house since the weekend. I knew it was going to be a special article that I would want to take in without distraction. The article is ‘What Trent Dalton heard in GoMA’s golden chair’ published in The Weekend Australia,
This is a wonderful article that makes you reflect on who you are, your life and your purpose. Or as the writer Mr David Malouf calls it “The workshop of yourself”. It also makes you think about those key relationships in your life. Are they being tended? Are you giving them time?
I cannot recommend this article enough for those curious about life and keen to be inspired and to learn some wonderful lessons.
For those interested in some self – reflection work around their purpose, you can download some complimentary guides to get you started.
Having being a career coach for well over a decade and worked with a diverse range of clients from various industries and professions (men and women), more often than not it is the men who include money in their list of core values. Occasionally women will, however, only very occasionally. Why is this? Below I have offered some thoughts.
Values can be seen as blurry things. If you need a refresher then below is a great descriptor of what values are from MindTools.
“Your values are the things that you believe are important in the way you live and work. They (should) determine your priorities, and, deep down, they’re probably the measures you use to tell if your life is turning out the way you want it to.”
If you are not sure what your core values are read ‘How To Define & Live Your Values’ and complete the values exercise.
Values & Greed!
For women it seems that having money as one of your core values could possibly translate into the view that your greedy. Is this perception or reality? I suspect a combination of the two.
When I coach men in their 20s – 50’s about their values in detail and what this means to them, and how it is played out in their work and lives, more often than not money translates into them being able to provide for their current or future families. And no, it is not a luxury yacht, expensive cars or endless overseas travel. It mostly is around having food on the table, paying the bills, a comfortable lifestyle and being able to educate their children. No doubt part of this also relates to status and a sense of self-worth.
So while certainly greed exists, I would suggest for the average person, they are looking to have a personally rewarding career and lifestyle. Is this greedy? I don’t think so. However men are much more comfortable with acknowledging this personal value, and articulating it publicly. For many women this is not the case. In addition, men generally are better at putting a fair or inflated monetary value on their contribution in the workplace.
Is it that it is not socially acceptable for women to acknowledge (which I believe is a part of it), the other is that women are just as likely to want the same output in terms of what money as a value offers. However, are less likely to acknowledge it – be it on a conscious or sub-conscious level. As a result this could potentially be contributing to pay inequality, with men four times as likely to initiate the negotiations as women.
My suspicion is that if you don’t talk about or acknowledge the importance of money in your life from a growth and opportunity perspective, you are less likely to find yourself in a positive money situation.
Money is one of my core values and the reasoning is not one of greed. For me it is twofold, when I work I expect to be paid fairly for the work I do, as this is a part of me defining my self-worth. Secondly, I know that as a child of a migrant, that money provides you with choices. My husband and I lead a far from lavish lifestyle. There is no designer car or high end fashion. We travel rarely and when we do it is in our own state. However for me the value of money is there because like most parents we hope to be able to offer our children the best education we can. I would also like to know that when retirement comes we will lead a comfortable lifestyle where I can continue to do voluntary work within the community. Is this greedy? No, it is a case of money offering choices.
Women’s roles & money
In an age where we have more women working and more separations in families, women’s roles have extended greatly, be it the sole, equal or shared income contributor. Yet this is not translating into equal salaries.
There is an element of denial in how important money is to our lives particularly by many women. Not so much when it comes to shopping, saving or the household budget, more around how the money is earned! The spending part is easy for us all to speak about. The how and valuing how hard it is to earn is the challenge. Also, valuing our contributions and asking to be paid more when warranted!
Last week I met with a friend who is a contender for a senior role and has pitched herself in the middle range of what they are offering – even though she is brilliant and should be pitching herself at the top of the pay scale! Sadly it is a common scenario – a women undervaluing her expertise and the value she brings.
Like me, you have no doubt heard the saying ‘If you do what you enjoy and do it well the money will follow’. I am not so sure about that. Perhaps for some, however, for many others this does not translate into their reality. I can tell you this from countless stories of women who spent their careers being loyal and working hard to deliver value to their employer/s and not being paid fairly for doing so. So we can carry on with this mantra or we can acknowledge that the world of work and pay is not about what is fair and rewarding those who do a good job. The onus is on us to value ourselves and to speak up.
I would love to see a mindset shift around how women define money as a value for their work and lives. Once this occurs we may start to see some even greater traction around pay equality.
Steps for Change
Chances are if you are reading this you may sit into one of the groups below or know someone who does that you would like to help.
A) For those unsure of their core values:
If you are keen to explore your values in more detail, complete my values exercise ‘How To Define & Live Your Values’ and complete the values exercise.
B) For those with money blockers:
If you know what your core values are, however have been reluctant to delve more into your value and attitudes towards money watch 4 Money Beliefs That Limit Your Wealth Inside and Out w/ Kate Northrup
C) For those wanting to negotiate their salary:
If you feel you are not being paid fairly and want to learn how to successfully negotiate your salary package, get a copy of my book ‘The Busy Women’s Guide to… Salary Negotiation’ from Amazon It’s less than $10 and pretty much everyone who has purchased and followed the steps has seen their bank balance and their confidence grow.
What are your views and/or experiences around women and money as a value? How have you changed this? What do you believe women need to be doing more of to overcome some of the money blockers we have?
You would be hard pressed to find a company that does not have some form of vision and/or mission statement that is publicly accessible. Companies are mixed, in that not all distinguish between the two. Google has one statement that they use interchangeably, which is “to organize all of the data in the world and make it accessible for everyone in a useful way“. While Ikea’s vision statement is –“At IKEA our vision is to create a better everyday life for the many people. Our business idea supports this vision by offering a wide range of well-designed, functional home furnishing products at prices so low that as many people as possible will be able to afford them.”
Whether you’re an employee or self-employed, it makes sense to have your own career related vision and/or mission statements. These build upon your core values and help define more clearly to you, and others, what is meaningful in your career. Jennell Evans has written a great article, ‘Vision and Mission – What’s the difference and why does it matter?’ While the article is written for organisations, the same fundamentals apply to us as individuals. If you think about it, you are the organisation. You market yourself and sell your time and expertise in return for money.
To assist in starting to create your vision statement, allow yourself time to reflect and imagine your ideal career and lifestyle 5-10 years from now. What would it look like? What kind of skills would you be using? With what types of people would you be working? How many hours per week? Where would you be based? Keep dreaming some more…….
If you need more help with your vision, see ‘The Power of Career Visioning: A How To Video & Steps’
The Career Vision Statement
In simple terms, the vision statement is created around the future state of what the entity (organisation or person) is working towards achieving over 5 – 10 years. It is written in a way that is inspirational and that can easily be understood and lived.
“Empowering people globally to experience happiness & purpose in their workdays.”
The mission statement is written in the here and now, and outlines the purpose of the organisation / entity. It has a short-term focus (1- 4 years) and is written in a succinct manner, so it can be easily recalled. It should support the vision statement.
Borrowing from Jennell Evans article, ‘Vision and Mission – What’s the difference and why does it matter?’ the mission statement needs to answer 3 key questions;
Example: Career Mission Statement
What: Deliver virtual coaching and digital career and lifestyle related resources
Who: People across the globe wanting to feel more empowered in their work and experience an increased sense of happiness and purpose.
How: Exceptional client service, innovation, listening focussed!
“Leader in virtual coaching & digital resources that empower people across the globe to experience greater happiness & purpose in their workdays. Innovative, client focused, ensuring people are heard.”
While you may not feel the need right now to craft your vision and / or mission statement, if you are feeling as though your career is drifting or are contemplating making some career changes, it can be a valuable exercise for creating clarity.
You may like to create your vision & mission statement using pen & paper, PowerPoint, Excel, Pinterest or any medium that works best for you. In an age of ‘Brand You’ it makes sense to be thinking of ourselves and our careers in a more marketing savvy way.